Special Edition WTF: Raccoons are NOT PROPS

I have to say this apparently

Look, I know the bar is so damn low for portrait photographers. Every new trend everyone runs to and some are just trying to find their niche. I get it.

However, raccoons and newborns ain’t it.

Blurred to protect the reckless.

Now, before any of you at me, the photographer does claim this raccoon was “hand raised” but has since been released to the wild so she no longer can book sessions with him since he comes and goes as he pleases.

So, I guess good that she’s no longer booking Rocko sessions but WHAT THE FUCK.

Allow me and MidJourney to have a moment here.

What photographers are going to see (above and below) and try to mimic:

What the reality could easily be:

Or…

Or

Look.

I love raccoons.

LOVE them. Their little trash panda ways make me happy. We have two damaged baby raccoons that hang out here I call “One Eyed Willie” and “Tripod” and I’ll let you guess how they got their names (I am not original with my naming…).

However, they are wild animals who can AND DO bite/attack for no reason, especially when there is food involved. WHY IN THE HELL IS THERE A CAKE AND A BABY AND A RACCOON TOGETHER?!

Beyond the fact that raccoons are bitey and unpredictable AF, there’s the whole rabies thing (and lice thing…). The photographer may claim the raccoon may be vaccinated but it’s not always effective and it doesn’t preclude the whole bitey thing (especially when sharing A CAKE! with a tiny human).

Don’t even get me started on the insurance aspect.

What the hell is next? Lions?

This was created in MidJourney, no babies were harmed or chased for dinner

Please for the love of the wee tiny humans who cannot fend off an animal attack stick to the non-bitey kind of props.